Much of our summer has been a great big bummer, thanks to the pandemic. But at least we still have Shark Week.
Yes, one of TV’s biggest annual events — the oceanic Super Bowl, if you will — returns to the Discovery Channel on Sunday and continues through Aug. 16. With more than 20 hours of programming on the docket, Discovery is promising “bigger sharks and breathtaking breaches,” along with plenty of celebrities, including Mike Tyson, Shaquille O’Neal, Will Smith, Snoop Dogg and Adam Devine, among others.
But why do sharks get their own week, you ask? Because Sperm Whale Week doesn’t sound nearly as cool.
In any event, here are eight jaw-some TV programs that we can’t wait to see:
“Tyson vs. Jaws: Rumble on the Reef” (9 p.m., Aug. 9): Iron Mike supposedly will go “head to head” with some of the ocean’s toothy predators as famed ring announcer Michael Buffer calls the shots. (No, really). Will Tyson attempt to bite the sharks’ ears? Do sharks even have ears?
“ShaqAttack” (9 p.m., Aug. 10): We’re rooting for two things to happen in this special: 1). Shaq dunks on a shark, and 2). Shaq feeds Charles Barkley to a shark. Sadly, neither scenario is likely.
“Will Smith: Off The Deep End” (9 p.m., Aug. 11): The movie star dives headfirst into action, excitement, and shark-infested waters as he confronts his fear of the open seas. We assume that August Alsina won’t be along for the trip.
“Great White Serial Killer Extinction” (10 p.m., Aug. 11): Apparently, great white sharks are on a killing spree that just might push the adorable California Sea Otter to extinction. We haven’t seen this much animosity since the Sharks took on the Jets.
“Air Jaws 2020” (8 p.m., Aug. 13): Let’s go to the highlight reel as this special celebrates 20 years of high-flying sharks. Sounds like the ultimate in see-worthy programming.
“Jaws in America” (9 p.m., Aug. 13): Stoner sharks? Snoop Dogg, of all people, examines why great whites are taking up residence along America’s shores in growing numbers.
“Tiger Shark King” (10 p.m., Aug. 14): Are there cannibals among the shark population? A researcher heads to the Caribbean, where cameras have captured footage of a poor tiger shark being assaulted by “a large, unseen beast.”
“Naked & Afraid of Sharks 2 (8 p.m., Aug. 16): This special spotlights five people who not only have lost their minds, but their clothes as well. Stranded on a remote strip of islands where the waters are teeming with predators, they must survive exclusively on what the ocean provides. … Bon appetit.